Tuesday, August 22, 2006

I'd nap there, but they won't let me

There's a minute between the time where the nurse removes the dildocam and washes her hands and leaves the room that is slightly awkward to me. It only takes a second for me to get up (though sometimes I find the dark room peaceful in spite of the position. Today I was told, "No sleeping.") What do you do in that minute? There's not much to chat about, really, she's just told me everything I need to hear. You could just get off the table and get dressed. What hasn't she seen already? But I don't like to clean up and get dressed with an audience (not that she'd be watching with a tub of popcorn or anything.) So I sit there on the table with my paper blanket and count the seconds until I can put my pants back on. Alone.

I am so tired.

Not looking forward to the part of stimming where you feel tired even when you're actually at rest.

1 comment:

Rebecca said...

I usually sit up, still clutching the paper drape in back, so that I can at least get out of the stirrups.

I hope the stims don't produce too many yucky side effects for you.