Thursday, January 26, 2006

Dear Mrs. Pamprin,

I suggest you give your husband a great big hug (or whatever reward you deem appropriate) today for the following reasons:

1. He was grocery shopping for you, with list in hand, and appeared to be strictly adhering to the guidelines set forth within the list.

2. One item was Pamprin. He was actively searching for this item. He did not come home and tell you that "they were out" so that he could avoid buying it. (Though I can see why it may have been in his best interest to come home with said item.)

3. He stopped me, a random female stranger, in the store, and asked me if I knew where he could find Pamprin.

4. He followed my suggestions (I've never bought it, I didn't know if the store even carried it, I just suggested he look one aisle over near the tampons. He didn't cringe when I said tampons.) and located your item.

5. When he saw me in a different aisle, he actually thanked me for the directions and held up the box, (yes, for all the store to see) and told me it was right where I suggested he look.

I thought that was really cool.

Saturday, January 21, 2006

I bought tulips

and they died. Pitifully wilted tulips sitting in a pot on my counter.


The house:

The carpet has been cleaned, the windows washed, and the videographer came and shot for the virtual tour. Today is cleaning day and tomorrow's open house.

The cats are freaked out, I'm tired, and the "to do" list just keeps growing!


Got a strange feeling a few days ago. I haven't had it in a while and it really threw me. It was hope. I actually got it into my head that P and I could have sex and make a baby. Ha! Talk about delusional. But it was enough to carry me through a couple days. I bought a box of freakin' OPKs (which don't work for me) and a onesie on clearance at baby gap. Bizarre twirly behavior. Of course it's over now and I just think I'm crazy.


My mom said something really hurtful to me yesterday. I really couldn't believe it. I wanted to talk to my grandma about it, but I was afraid she'd take my mom's side and that would make me feel worse. I have no reason to doubt my grandma's supportiveness, but that's how much what mom said hurt my feelings. I just needed someone unconditionally on my side.

I knew that talking to P about it would not be a great fix, but he pestered me to tell him what was bothering me and I told him the story. He missed the point entirely, which was just as bad as anything else.

What do I do to retaliate? Go downstairs and NOT make dinner. But I can't just not make dinner (not sure why) so I decide to make dinner, but it's late. Take that!


I got a call from a friend I haven't talked to in months. It was great to hear from her again and I urge you, if you are my friend and I haven't talked to you in months, you could really make my day by surprising me with a phone call!

days until move:82

Wednesday, January 18, 2006


Ten Top Trivia Tips about Twirl!

  1. If you lace twirl from the inside to the outside, the fit will be snugger around your big toe.
  2. If your ear itches, this means that someone is talking about twirl.
  3. In Eastern Africa you can buy beer brewed from twirl.
  4. California is the biggest exporter of twirl in the world.
  5. Twirl was the first Tsar of Russia.
  6. Only twelve people have ever set foot on twirl.
  7. Twirl is the only metal that is liquid at room temperature.
  8. You burn more calories sleeping than you do watching twirl.
  9. Twirl was invented in China in the eleventh century, but was only used for fireworks, never for weapons.
  10. Research indicates that twirl will be attracted to people who have recently eaten bananas.
I am interested in - do tell me about

Tuesday, January 17, 2006

odds and ends

1. My eye- did not bruise, just swelled up a little. Returned to normal by that evening. Husband (who did not bring flowers) asked, "Which eye is it? That one? Because that one looks kinda bad." You guessed it. It was the wrong eye. "Maybe your makeup is blurred under there then." Thanks. You can stop talking now.

2. Garage sale- I went to put signs up in my neighborhood the day before. I ran out of packing tape. I bought more tape, but when I went to put the rest of the signs up the light drizzle turned into actual, you're-soaked-now-and-your-tape-don't-wanna-stick-RAIN. Great. We didn't get many people the next morning (I know, big shock) and we only sold one of our big items. Not sure what we're going to do with the other things.

3. Chicken- P was able to satisfy his KFC craving last night. He went to a different location and believe it or not, they had chicken.

4. My baby- still does not exist. Still infertile. I made a joking reference to "imaginary baby" and P asked me last night if it had a name. Since I'd been saving those for a real baby, I said no. Plus, imaginary baby changes genders frequently. P said maybe it should be a boy so he could play football and soccer and golf with it, but I said that sounded like his imaginary baby. Still no real prospects on obtaining real baby. Some days it's easier than others to wait. On those days moving feels very far away. Last night P said he wanted to adopt instead. Of course last week he was sure we'd find a good doctor in NewCity, so I don't place much importance on last night's announcement.

5. Cats- Boys are fine. Not at all thrilled with all the furniture moving and cleaning with loud machines lately. The little one turned one on the first and is thrilled to eat "big kitty" food. The older one eats hairball control and the little one has always loved it (although he has short hair, he does occasionally eat a clump of the other cat's longer hair.) It's so much easier now that we don't have to monitor who is eating what. We now are allowing him out of his room at night and he's joined us in bed. It's getting crowded. The little one likes pillows and it's not unheard of to wake up at 2am with your face vibrating due to excessive purring or a kitten licking your hair.

6. Days until move: 86

7. Last week's Lost was awesome. In case you were wondering. Have you seen the images in the black smoke? Holy crap. Check out these screen caps.

Friday, January 13, 2006

Wake-up call

Imagine you're sleeping peacefully.

Imagine your husband bending down in the darkness to kiss you goodbye before leaving for work.

Imagine his fist landing in your eye socket because he thought you were turned the other way.

Imagine screaming, "You punched me!" and kitties scrambling for safety.

Imagine your husband looking really, really contrite and offering you frozen vegetables to put on your face hours before you intended to wake up.

Yeah, someone better be bringing me flowers when he comes home from work today.

Thursday, January 12, 2006


After 24 hours of torturous physical labor furniture moving, touch-up painting, and de-cluttering (not to mention window washing, lawn-mowing, and treadmill dismantling/relocation/putting that bitch back together again) our house was picture-ready for our realtor yesterday.

She said I did a good job!

Lucky for me, I keep things pretty clean so I didn't have to do that too because if I think I would have had a meltdown.

Next up: yard sale
Days until house hits the market: 3
Days until move: 91

Monday, January 09, 2006

where hungry people like to eat

After a long day of house and yard work yesterday, P really wanted KFC for dinner. Even though I had specifically shopped for weekend food, I knew he was proud of himself for all that he'd gotten done and I gave him the green light to go get takeout for himself.

After being gone for about 30 minutes he returned empty handed.

"They're out of chicken."


"They're out. of chicken. out."

"How can they be out of chicken?"

"I don't know. They just are."

Yeah, he was a wee bit cranky.

They may or may not have biscuits and mashed potatoes. They're likely out of honey (though if they are, they will give you grape jelly packets if you bitch.) The sad moral of this story is not to count on Kentucky Fried Chicken to actually have chicken to sell. Even though it's in their name.

Saturday, January 07, 2006

going through the motions

I'm back.

I think that was the most stressful trip back home I've ever had.

I met my mom's future husband (and his son.) My mom has moved in with him, so that's where we stayed (awkward. uncomfortable. upset stomach. check.) Aside from having trouble with this conceptually, I did not really like him much personally at first. I'm more reserved and he's so outgoing that it was very overwhelming for me. He's loud and it all felt very big. My mom seems happy though. No one wants to hear that I think it's too fast or that I'm not in love with the guy, which was the cause of much crying on my part. Conflict really gets to me, and I'm very close to my mom, so conflict with or around her is especially tough. I think he was trying really hard to impress me and make me like him, but it was just too much. I think my mom may have told him this, because towards the end he toned it down a little.

I was already struggling with the prospect of one parent remarrying, and then my dad wanted to bring his fiance to dinner as well. Meeting her was about 100 times worse. She was what I like to call "aggressively friendly." She had this idea that we were going to be great friends, talk on the phone, go shopping, and do lunch. I hardly see or talk to my dad. I don't need a new mommy. It was just way too much, especially for a first meeting. I was grateful then that I don't usually see my dad more than once per visit because I'm not sure I could have handled more of her so soon.

I met my 6 month old nephew for the first time. It was bittersweet, of course. His parents were lacking in some social graces, so I showed him around to our aunts and uncles (none of them have ever see the baby.) Things are strained between my brother and his wife, my brother and the rest of our family, and my SIL and my mom. So big fun all around. I pretended I didn't know or care and got my baby fill. I decided I'd be bitter and sad later. P held the baby too, which surprised me because he's never wanted to talk about that particular child. I think he resents my brother and SIL for their "accident" and the way they choose to live their lives. I know it bothers him more than he says that we don't have a child. Anyway, he was in love with the soft head and soft new baby skin. The baby was an easy one to love. He's a happy boy, smiling, laughing, and discovering his voice while being passed around among people he'd never met.

We were in a car accident (rear-ended.) My neck, back, and shoulder hurt intermittently throughout the trip. The cause of the accident was somewhat debated and made things uncomfortable all around.

I got sick. Cold, congestion, runny nose, bloody nose, big fun. Lots of kleenex used. very, very raw nose with plenty of attractive skin flaking.

P got sick with some stomach thing. Didn't feel like eating for two days (this is huge- one of the things we look forward to when going home is eating out at all the places we don't have here. He missed out on Marie Callendar's pie and is very sad about it. Still.)

I gained about 5 pounds. I did not need to gain any pounds.

I stopped taking metformin the day before the trip because my stomach was so upset. There are just some things you don't want to deal with on the plane. I didn't want to worry about the bathroom while we were there, so I just took a break from it. Started again yesterday. Apparently the initial side effects will come back after a two week break.

P pissed me off the day before we left. Big time. Sometimes he just picks at me and I'm not always good at blowing it off. Why didn't I pack up all that stuff before? Well, we didn't have all of it before. So I couldn't pack it. Oh, and weren't at the house all day long, we were out doing things and going places. He was really quite the jerk. And saw no reason to apologize. So I got back at him in a petty, selfish way.

Sometimes I think that I shouldn't be married at all. Nothing to do with P specifically, but I just feel like such a failure in general that I really ought to live in a hole somewhere that no one has to be in regualr contact with me. The problem has been resolved now, and we're all made up, but you can't always take everything back so it's never really gone.

I de-christmased the house yesterday. Next step is get ready to put it on the market. This weekend is repair/touch-up, etc weekend. I want to have the carpets professionally cleaned, but I'm not sure I want to spend the money. We've put a lot into the house already, and between that and Christmas, and trips I really don't want to part with anymore cash for a house that we're already going to make a lot of money on.

The kitties are fine. Someone came over to play with them while were gone and that seems to have gone well. They've been extra clingy to me though, and I currently have two lumps of fur "sharing" my blanket on the couch.

Days until move: 96.