Top Ten Reasons to Love a Burst Cyst

10. quality middle-of the night time spent with your cats since you're down on the floor anyway

9. the added exercise you get when you realize all of your painkillers are at the complete opposite side of the damn house

8. finding out where the hospital is in your new city even if you don't end up going

7. not having to go out to breakfast when you really didn't want to but were going to anyway because your husband wanted to

6. finding you on the stairs shivering and only mostly conscious turns a tired, cranky husband into a helpful, caring sweetheart (who might drive you nuts by asking you every 30 minutes if you're feeling better. but hey, he's asking!)

5. funny tumor jokes made at the expense of your fibroid (poor bastard gets blamed for everything around here!)

4. staying in bed watching "Honey, We're Killing the Kids" for hours because you're too tired to do anything else

3. drug-induced naps

2. wearing fat pants, loose pants, or no pants is perfectly acceptable

1. decisions made for the indecisive. worried about your upcoming cycle? don't bother because your doctor will be very reluctant to let you go anyway. problem solved!