How you know if it's a date (parental edition)

1.  There is no baby at the table, so you are free to place your silverware, glasses, menus, napkins, salt & pepper shakers, and plates wherever you like.  Even directly in front of you.

2.  Anything dropped on the floor is your own fault.  You do not bend down repeatedly to pick up a stuffed cow.  In fact, you didn't even bring a stuffed cow.

3.  You do not ask the waiter for a plastic cup, empty please, and a couple extra straws.

4.  You have to stop at the ATM for cash.  And it's not for you.

5.  You shaved one half of one leg.  And feel pretty.

how do i get past this?

I have some very bad-hurt feelings about something that has happened recently.

To my face, P's parents backed me up/supported me on something that happened to me but then behind my back (to P and to someone else) said something entirely different (blaming the situation on me, and a related situation on my mom.)

I know that's not at all clear, but it's a long story and I don't know how to tell it and then get to the point.  Which is this:  These people, for better or for worse, are now my family.  I WILL have to see them and interact with them in the future.  But every time I think about this thing, I get mad/sad/hurt/pissed/betrayed all over again.  How do I sit on their couch and chat or answer the phone or... knowing how they really feel?  

-I don't especially want to have it out with them, as I suspect they will not change their minds on this one so it wouldn't really do any good.  Not to mention that they could just lie to me like before and nothing would be resolved anyway.

-I can't have P talk to them because he doesn't really get why it bothers me so much (that's a whole other (heartbreaking) topic) and though he now sees it from my POV (or at least he says he does) there was a time where he didn't and was more in agreement with his parents.  I'm guessing his true feelings lie somewhere in the middle.

-I don't see another way out other than to just get over it and play nice.  I just wish I knew how to do that.

I'm sure this all makes very little (if any!) sense, but I had to get it out.  I don't really have anyone to talk to about it who isn't involved or invested in some way.  The situation itself makes me want to cry, but then add the "family response" part to it, and I'm just having a really hard time. 

Sprung!

My Little guy came home today!  I wasn't expecting it at all.  I was thinking tomorrow, maybe, unless we determined he needed surgery (which he still might, but not for now.)  He's peeing on his own and he's been off catheter for over 12 hours now.  Exciting stuff.  I have to bring him in tomorrow for a bladder check just to make sure he's still ok.  

The home-care part is a lot of work!  He has to take three pills two times per day.  That's SIX pills.  Have you ever given your cat six pills in one day?  I wish it was a shot!  He also must eat special food (he hasn't had one bite - I measured!) and he has his own box (for now, just so I can monitor his output apart from the Big Kitty) so he's shut up in our room/bathroom by himself.  At least it's familiar.  At the vet's they said he was a sweetheart but very nervous.  I could tell.  I visited him for an hour every day and he jumped every time a drawer was shut in another room!  They put him as far away from the dogs as possible, but there's nothing comforting about being at the hospital, even for a cat.

I can tell he wants to prowl around the house, but I want him where I can find him easily and monitor his activities.  Hopefully he'll just rest and eat.

Another interesting (or not) tidbit - while I was gone Birdie had a poopy diaper.  It's the first one P has had to deal with since we switched to cloth (yeah, in April!) and he texted me to tell me about it.  Being a parent is awesome!

"How's the kitty?"

He's very sick, but we're just waiting. He has a good shot, but he's not exactly on the way to better yet. If that makes any sense.

It doesn't.

Oh. Sorry.

What was the matter with him anyway?

He's "blocked."

Um, ok, and that means what?

It means he has/had "sand" (debris/crystals) in his bladder and it's clogging his urethra when he tries to pee. This is very painful and if not discovered within 24-48 hours can be fatal.

Wow. How did you know that he was blocked then?

A couple weeks ago there were pee drops on the floor. I thought they needed a new litter box, so we did that and I thought the problem went away. Then, Monday afternoon I stepped on something damp and saw that we had pee dirbble again. Damn. So I planned to call the vet the next morning (it was nearly 5.) I went to my bathroom and saw on the light colored tile a tiny spot of blood. So I walked the rooms that the kitties frequent and discovered a few other drops that I'd overlooked. I decided to call the vet right then.

They asked me a few questions and told me to bring him in IMMEDIATELY.

Did they really speak in capital letters?

Yes.

That's strange. Why?

Well, the male urethra is very narrow and easily blocked. The blood is a bad sign. If a cat strains and is unable to urinate, his bladder will fill up.

I have a full bladder all the time. What's so scary about that?

Well, if he can't empty it, it will become toxic. Then the kidneys will stop bothering to make urine because there's no place for it to go.

Oh, I see. What do they do for that?

Well, step one was to unblock him. They did this while sedated and with a catheter. He then got a ton of antibiotics and painkillers. Then they waited to see how he was, took the catheter out to see if he was better. He did well, peed right away.

Then why is he still sick?

Because they watch the kitty for 12 hours to make sure he doesn't re-block. My guy failed this test. He re-blocked and they had to put the catheter back in. There's still stuff in his bladder and without the catheter it would keep blocking his urethra.

Can you wrap this up please? You're saying "urethra" a lot.

Ok, I have to go anyway because Birdie is waking up. I'll finish this later. Come back to read about a very very awful Plan C (it will make your husband cringe.)

plea

I've been a bad blogger. A bad internet friend. I've hardly posted and rarely commented. But I'm going to ask you for a favor now.

The kitten (ok, so he's 3, but he's still my baby) is very sick and in the kitty hospital. If there's anyone still reading, please, please, please would you pray/think happy thoughts/direct good vibes/anything his way? Please? He's Birdie's favorite pet and he sleeps by my head and he chases flies and knocks over his water bowl every time and I love him.

I get to visit him this afternoon, so more about that and what's wrong with him later.